18 March 2005

Peculiar Poetry Point Prequel

The following intriguing and scary poems and songs should have been broadcast before the "first" edition of the Peculiar Poetry Point. Unfortunately, because of a minor temporal fault, that Peculiar Poetry Point was broadcast before it was recorded. We at Broadcasting Basement would like to take this opportunity to iron the record flat and straight, so that it doesn't have any of those cursed creases, by running the tape that should have been broadcast the first time. Now, where's that Play button...

And only last week John Major was heard to remark, "If I had a hammer...it'd likely feel unfulfilled as I don't have any nails," at the annual anti-DIY rally in...

No, that's not the right tape...

First up, a short Ode to Blue Tac by Xlucieh:

Blue tac is a wonderful thing
It cannot ever fail
For who would want to be putting up
A poster with a nail?

Now I think we have a much longer song by the same composer. You may recognise the tune as that of Yankee Doodle.

Lucie is a special girl
And she really likes killing
She's trying to take over the world
With merriful blood spilling

Kill the people, kill them all!
And make the world a shrine
I'll start it all out with Sparkle
Then Carol will be mine!

Now that all the world is dead
Or at least in agony
Lucie still has Imogen
So she will not get lonely!

Kill the people, kill them all!
And make the world a shrine
I'll start it all out with Sparkle
Then Carol will be mine!

The little badger needs a friend
To make sure her life's painless
Though soon enough she will get bored
And we'll need a replacement

Kill the people, kill them all!
And make the world a shrine
I'll start it all out with Sparkle
Then Carol will be mine!

Lucie's shrine of death will thrive
With such a vicious leader
She will kill most stealthily
They will not even see her

Kill the people, kill them all!
And make the world a shrine
I'll start it all out with Sparkle
Then Carol will be mine!

Well... *clears throat* ...Uh, that's the end of the tape. I really don't know why The Powers That Be decided to broadcast that rubbish. A whole week and that's the best they could manage...

Comments: 6

Blogger Jingle Bella Said...  
Well, it's not quite as good as Lucie's, but ...

Lucie, you're a special girl
But I don't approve of killing
If you take over the world
These should be no blood spilling

Don't kill the people, let them live
The world is not a shrine
You start it all out with Sparkle
And I'll extract your spine

Now that I've caught attention
I must explain more fully
Imogen would not take part
She'd rather watch some telly

Don't kill the people, let them live
The world is not a shrine
You start it all out with Sparkle
And I'll extract your spine

The little badget needs a friend
But you might get the sack
Imogen must have morals -
Morals it seems you lack

Don't kill the people, let them live
The world is not a shrine
You start it all out with Sparkle
And I'll extract your spine

Deathshrines often are short-lived
And likewise are their leaders
I suggest reformation -
You should really heed this

--Carol
Blogger Sparkle Said...  
I approve of Carol's version more ....

Though I don't see the words "Don't kill Sparkle"

*coils into a ball* *becomes very paranoid*
Blogger Jingle Bella Said...  
I thought "Don't kill the people" covered it ... for the record: Lucinda! Don't kill Sparkle!
Blogger Sparkle Said...  
Thank you.
Blogger Blinky The Potato Girl Said...  
Brilliant! Wow, I feel so special, no one's ever written a song about me before...

=D

Though really I am the ultimate spine extracter.

Lucie
Blogger Jingle Bella Said...  
I know, that's why it's ironic.

Or something.

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