21 December 2005

Suddenly Smashing Some Silence

A large proportion of our listeners have written in concerning the recent lack of broadcasts from this station. In response to their questions, we shall explain why the airwaves have been silent:

For the past few weeks, we have been completely occupied with the tasks of reclaiming Broadcasting Basement and bringing its anvil-crazed captor, Sydney Sodno, to justice. The former task has been accomplished successfully -- you may have noticed that you are now once again listening to Tiny Tickle UnRadio instead of the ghastly Anvil UnRadio. Unfortunately, Sodno has proven somewhat harder to justicify.

Defending himself in court, he calmly explained to the jury the various pros and cons of tucking ones trousers into ones socks. Apparently, he believes that doing so:
  1. keeps ones legs warmer,
  2. makes it easier to put on boots, and
  3. makes ones trousers less likely to tangle in the chain-wheel whilst cycling.
However, it also tends to make one look silly, and if one is wearing a skirt then tucking that into ones socks would generally be foolish unless one had only one leg. Unusually tight socks should be avoided in most situations, as Mr Sodno claimed to have discovered during a recent trip into London.

When asked why he had digressed into a seemingly irrelevant subject, he told the judge that he was conducting a demonstration, and that he could, if given the chance, use his abilities to improve legal procedures worldwide.

He had, he claimed, been informed that, as part of his rights, anything he said could and would be used against him in a court of law. "But," he asked, "could anyone use my advice on socks and trousers against me in this court? ...Beyond reasonable doubt, of course."

The answer, as far as the jury could discern after much murmuring, was No. The wily anvil-crazed accused thus seized the opportunity to claim that it would be unfair to continue the trial until the criminal rights had been rewritten to correct this error and the various other errors which it allegedly contained.

The court decided that the Mr Sodno would be more useful in their legal practices than in prison, and promptly closed the case. We have appealed but have yet to receive a coherent response on any subject other than the legalities of socks, anvils and trousers.

We will bring you updates intermixed with our usual schedule. Stay tuned!

Comments: 2

Blogger Jingle Bella Said...  
An update! Wahey!

*tucks trousers into socks*
Blogger Blinky The Potato Girl Said...  
Trousers tucked into socks... That reminds me when a girl in my year used to mock us geeks by pulling her trousers up to her armpits and tucking them into her socks, and stealing a pair of glasses. Not that we looked like that... Although when I first arrived, I was guilty of 'ankle swinging'...

It also enables you to show off the oddness of your socks better - even better if they're anvil socks.

Lucie

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